/ if i ever wrote one, it would be this

the things i regret most

having glasses that never fit my face
never being able to remember the important stuff in life
seeing things from the view point that no one else sees
the immorality of society,
the way she twists and turns at the every whim of the masses
anger; damage

i hate most

pompous people
everyone is the same, but no on believes
peace is for sell, but no one purchases
anger; damage

other things, indifferent in nature

never knowing the full potential
having tact, and not having tact
illnesses, and their fake cousins
anger; damage

you know, i feel like i just wasted my day
hundreds of dollars spent on souls
that one day will lay wasted like the rest of the earth.

Why is blood red? makes me smile and cringe at the
same time

never having the satisfaction of getting what I want
never, the women, never the fun
being bigger...being smaller, never any luck
never any gratitude

i never wanted anything, i never complained
why not this one thing?

one thing I ask, I did not receive
a smart child you say, obedient, never seen someone
with as good a head on their shoulders as me

but they are the captain of their ship
mind what they say, and do as they ask

i never hit anyone with an umbrella,
she blew a whistle in your ear and I told her what I thought about it

and like last year, words for flatulence
a disruption in order, come on?

other things i forgot to mention

the ones i loved, knew it, for i told them so
sorry if this is a selfish act, but damn
there is a song for this, can't get no
but you know how that goes, and you seem to not care
reading was more fun.

walking back to, there were dirt roads, gravel, and some loose cement
i remember the bus ride there, with my clown shoes
a tooth paste fight and the like
but it was what i said, the fact that you know
i really did sum it up, and you laughed
we could have been good, but you know, you have your bf
and I had my science fiction or whatever sad pass time owned me

i say, i told you, and made up a lie i told more than once
there was horses there, and the name of a prominent family all around
we didn't seem to care, except for the rules that some broke, and I had to keep
except for the lies we were told on more than one occasion

you weren't the first, and certainly not the last
so much so, your name is not even in this, my last
i just wanted to give a synopsis, something saying
i can't cope, my best ideas were a t-shirt, and some arson
why was she like that. she could have been cordial, she could
have just said, sir please no, but nah... she prefers the other
the other method, let's get the stick and stir some too.

i was told once, by several wise me, several things
but i never really listened to any of them, i had a fear of
a fear of making someone from up north right, even if they never
knew. i was afraid that i might realize the truth. so i followed
the advice of a man that was not wise, probably not even smart

i realized, i sat, i grew farther from the truth i knew what was happening


When you are seven, and asked about your future you say something neat like
fireman, or astronaut, or baseball player.

(because of society,
and the way that professions are portayed at an
early age to the youth, probably because we actually like child labor)

well, my major flaw was that i was no where near this
at first
i said i probably wouldn't ever see a career
not because people in my past didn't have good ones but because i could see
i wasn't built to carry on

then i decided that hitman was a noble profession and no one found it necessary to
tell me that this was not noble

that, vision problems, the south and others made me, me.

i tried to write a conclusion, but this is long enough, i should have put
chocolate syrup on it or something, it tastes bad like this
and it ain't like i am gonna have to clean it again.





and at some point

it's not like i want to be whiney
and it's not like i want to complain
i know the kids in afrika or whatever suffer
but i cant take much more
tapping beer bottles at a soft pace will eventually
break them

just keep putting it off, and let them deal with it
deal with it